The fact that you are Black and your partner isn’t doesn’t mean she or he isn’t prejudiced against other people who look like you or that your partner can't commit racist acts.A person could hold on to racist beliefs and still believe that “you’re one of the good ones."You don't have to get fresh cornrows, start listening to trap music, or attempt speaking African-American Vernacular English just because you're trying to date a Black dude. And remember, there's a difference between appreciation and appropriation, as Maisha Z.
Why does seeing a black man with a white woman stir up a hornet’s nest of racism, but not the reverse?(This comment itself makes people bristle as if it is impossible for a white woman to experience microaggressions in the first place.)Too many of my friends here—even after recent developments in racial discourse on campus like the “I, Too, Am Harvard” campaign—seem comfortable being vocally critical of my decision of whom to love.I will never forget sitting in the Quincy dining hall with two of my (nonwhite) friends who spent about 10 minutes picking and choosing which features from my boyfriend and I would create the “perfect baby.” I remember sitting there, feeling extremely uncomfortable, because although the comments of “Your eyes, your hair” and “his lips” were meant as compliments, I was hurting.She was probably very nice; but I cannot say for sure.She was shy and didn't talk much in what was likely an unfamiliar and perhaps overwhelming African American social setting.